DAY 10: When I saw the roots of rock and roll…both of them!

Sun Records (http://www.sunstudio.com/)

OK. Yesterday I saw how it ended; today I get to see where it began. My first stop this morning is the legendary Sun Studio and if you are a fan of Johnny Cash, Elvis Presley, Carl Perkins, Jerry Lee Lewis or rock and roll, you must check this place out. It’s hard to believe that this tiny little studio launched so many careers and tours are given daily at the bottom of every hour from 10am-6pm and cost a mere $12. Our tour guide Jane was great. She’s cute as a button and so enthusiastic. She really loves her job and who wouldn’t love talking about this stuff all day? She brought us upstairs to the display cases of Sam Phillips’s first recording equipment. It was a simple mono track device and huge as hell! No wonder he needed a permanent place to house this equipment. Sam Phillips fun fact: He never owned the studio building, he only leased it. He started out by recording the blues artists that he loved and called the place Memphis Recording Service. Before Elvis, Sam recorded “Rocket 88” one of my favorite songs by Jackie Brenston and his Delta Cats featuring a 19-year-old Ike Turner. We got to see the original speaker they used to record the song, which ended up falling out of their car on the way to the recording session and broke. They tried to fix it but they had to put newspaper in the speaker system and it ended up giving the song a distorted sound so many people do consider “Rocket 88” to be the first distorted rock and roll song in history. I love hearing stories like this! By the time Elvis came along, Sam had turned the recording studio into an official record label and named it Sun Records. Jane told us that he chose the word and image of “sun” because it symbolized a new beginning. How prophetic. During this part of the tour, Jane occasionally played a few seconds of important recordings like “Rocket 88” or “Bear Cat” by Rufus Thomas (an answer song to Big Mama Thornton’s hit “Hound Dog”. Yes, in case you didn’t know, it was her song before Elvis recorded it). Rufus Thomas will also appear later today in my tour of the Stax Records museum. Sam was only 27 years old at the time he started this recording studio. He was just trying to do something he loved. He had no idea what it would turn into (a lesson to all of us when we’re not sure what path to take…just do what you love!). Sam was just interested in bringing the music he loved to the people and he didn’t care if the musicians were black or white. But it’s easy to forget how controversial it was at that time to be bringing that type of music to white America. There was even a guy in our tour group, he was probably in his 60s, who told us that when he was a teenager, his mother would never let him listen to Elvis; until Elvis released some religious songs and then she that it was OK. In fact, when Elvis released “That’s All Right” the station that played it was flooded with requests for the song from both black and white listeners.

From L to R: Sam Phillips' early recording equipment, the exterior of Sun Records, the broken speaker used for "Rocket 88".

Next it was down the stairs into the actual recording studio that is still in use today. Jane said that a lot of famous people will drop by the studio and that John Cougar Mellencamp stopped by just last week. Here you get to see the desk where Marion Kistler sat. She was Sam’s secretary and the woman who was responsible for getting Elvis’s recording to Sam in the first place so where’s her induction into the rock hall of fame? I’m just saying y’all, behind every successful man is a good woman! It was a real D.I.Y. operation. I mean Marion and Sam even installed the light fixtures themselves and Sam built the wavy ceiling from an instructional guide he read about in Popular Mechanics magazine. It was pretty amazing to stand in that place where so many legends started. Sam even put a mark on the floor to note where Elvis stood when he recorded “That’s All Right” and you can still see it to this day. I actually enjoyed this tour much more than Graceland. Again, maybe because it was simple and more humble and captured the early Elvis that I like but as Jane said, “Well people like this place because let’s face it, if there were no Sun Records, there would be no Graceland.” On the wall is a picture of the famous Million Dollar Quartet, an impromptu jam session with Carl Perkins, Elvis Presley, Johnny Cash, and Jerry Lee Lewis. In fact, Johnny Cash was just stopping by to pick up a paycheck but they all started jamming and it ended up going all night long. Sam, genius that he is, called the local newspaper to come by and take a photo. By that time, Sam had sold Elvis’ contract to RCA because he was struggling financially but he recorded the entire session. For years, it was only available as a bootleg but eventually he worked out a deal with RCA to release it officially.

The Million Dollar Quartet!

Jane is more than happy to share all of these little insider tidbits with us and she finished the tour by strumming a little bit of Johnny Cash’s “Walk the Line”. It seems that Johnny loved the sound of a snare drum, but drums were not used on country music back then, so he placed a piece of paper in his guitar strings and created his own unique “snare drum”. Jane demonstrated this effect with a dollar bill.

Our tour guide is multi-talented: knowledgeable, enthusiastic, and a great Johnny Cash impersonator.

After that we were free to walk around and take pictures and we were even allowed to touch the microphone that Elvis used when he recorded his songs. For a moment I was like, “Oh my God, I’m holding the microphone that Elvis touched!” but then I thought about all the thousands of people who probably touched it and then it felt like “Wow, is Elvis’s aura even still on this thing any more?”

Wouldn't it be great if they announced that I was the millionth customer to visit Sun Records and balloons and confetti fell down from the ceiling? I guess I'll just have to settle for the honor of touching Elvis's microphone instead.

Jane reminded us that tips are not required but appreciated. Which reminds me, you should always tip your tour guide. People often forget to do it but I imagine they don’t make a lot of money so it does help and plus she was really great. Afterwards I bought some souvenirs and hung out in the café for a bit. The café was formerly Taylor’s restaurant where a lot of the musicians would hang out and get a “meat and three” to eat. Jane tells us that this is a southern expression for “a meat with 3 sides”. Once Sam sold Sun Records, the building sat empty until 2003 and miraculously the interior and much of the equipment remained untouched. But do you want to hear the sad thing? Sam Phillips died one day before the original Sun Studio was declared a historic landmark. R.I.P. Sam Phillips.

Stax Records / Soulsville U.S.A. (http://www.soulsvilleusa.com/)

Do you think I’ve had my fill of music history and nostalgia? Well I haven’t so off I go to the Stax Records museum. It really is amazing to think of the accomplishments of the people who started these companies and the artists they helped to develop and it’s hard not to feel like a loser because I haven’t accomplished anything nearly as monumental. I know, not everyone can do something of this magnitude but I think we all just want to be acknowledged for our gifts and contributions. It’s only human to want to be recognized for something good in this world.

On this particular day the museum was pretty empty. The tour is self-guided and starts with a short film about the history of Stax. Then it’s off to see the displays. You’re actually not allowed to take pictures in here but no one was around so I did a bad thing and broke a rule by taking a picture of the Ike and Tina display. I didn’t use a flash though so I don’t think I did any damage. Does this make me a bad person…especially after all my yearning in the previous paragraph about wanting to be recognized for doing something good in this world? I don’t think this act of disobedience will be it! I’m sorry Stax Museum. It won’t happen again.

My crime...for all the world to see.

Like Sun Records, the Stax label launched some amazing careers, started out as a basic “mom and pop” operation, and recorded both black and white music artists. If it weren’t for Stax, who knows if we would have heard of Otis Redding, Booker T. & the MGs, Sam & Dave, Isaac Hayes, and many more. Stax was started in 1957 by a banker named Jim Stewart who was recording country music in his wife’s uncle’s garage. He eventually opened the Satellite Record Store. When he moved his “recording studio” to Brunswick, his sister Estelle Axton mortgaged her home to pay for the recording equipment. Um, I hate to bring this up again guys, but here’s another example of a woman playing a pivotal role in creating something historical. I’m just saying that Estelle Axton and Marion Kistler are probably hanging out in heaven right now giving each other props!

In 1959, they moved to the old Capitol Theater where the museum stands now. Rufus Thomas, who also recorded at Sun Records, had a hit with his daughter Carla titled “Cause I Love You”. After years of struggling, a local high school R&B band, the Mark-Keys, cut an instrumental hit (“Last Night”) that finally put Satellite Records on top and Stewart and Axton formed their record label, Stax Records. They took the name by combining the first two letters of each of their last names. The Mark-Keys evolved into Booker T. and the MGs and become the Stax house band for the next 8 years. Booker T. and the MGs were made up of two black musicians and two white musicians. They were interracial long before the Doobie Brothers and Sly and the Family Stone. The displays feature albums, costumes, and video interviews from notable Stax artists and executives. There was even a display of an old Baptist church to illustrate the importance of church music and services in the evolution of black music in America. As I made my way through the displays and history simultaneously, I eventually came upon a dance floor with a TV that showed a montage of “Soul Train” TV show clips and funk music playing on the speakers. I can vividly remember watching “American Bandstand” on Saturday mornings and then staying up late on Saturday nights to watch “Soul Train”. You are allowed to dance on the dance floor here, but it was pretty empty and I hate to dance alone so I moved on. The Satellite Record Store was known for being a place where kids could hang out and listen to music all day if they wanted to and they were never pressured to buy anything. Can you imagine a store today allowing kids to just hang out all day? I know, everything is bought online these days but it’s the principle! A lot of kids would hang out there and eventually get odd jobs helping out the musicians, and maybe even become musicians themselves. Estelle created a very open, family-like environment and while not everyone had musical talent, she would certainly give everyone a chance to at least audition. Many of the interview subjects commented on how there was absolutely no racial tension amongst the artists at Stax. No one cared if you were black or white. All they cared about was making good music and working together, but sadly, after the assassination of MLK, some underlying tension started to emerge.

My favorite display was the Isaac Hayes exhibit, specifically his gold plated peacock blue Cadillac, which they have on a rotating display at the museum. The Stax Record Company gave Isaac Hayes this car as a gift for his unparalleled success in 1971 and 1972 and the car was decked out with a refrigerated bar and a color TV. But remember this is 1972 so the bar and the TV are huge and bulky! There was a video next to the display that showed Isaac driving the car through the Memphis neighborhoods and talking about how much he loved it. I was not ballsy enough to sneak another illegal picture at the museum, especially of this display because I’m sure there are security cameras all over this one, but here’s a youtube video of it that I found:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VN_XCrDHTdk&feature=related

http://soulofamerica.com/cgi-bin/slideviewer.cgi?list=mem-stax&dir=&config=&design=soadesign&refresh=&scale=0&slide=12

Along with displays of Isaac Hayes’ costumes and records, there was a Black Moses Phone! It’s this huge, obnoxious looking 70’s style phone (sorry, I can’t find a picture of it online anywhere) but next to it was a sign that read “No female could resists a caller on the Black Moses Phone.” I love it!

While Stax Records eventually went into bankruptcy and the original studio demolished, luckily the recordings were salvaged. In 2003, a replica of the Stax Studio was built on the same site where the historic Stax recording sessions took place. If you’re in Memphis, you should definitely take a trip to Soulsville U.S.A.!

The 3 pictures I was allowed to take. I'm looking forward to coming back when Memphis Slim's house is restored!

Beale Street

After seeing music in museums, I decided to actually hear some live music on Beale Street. Beale Street reminds me a lot of Bourbon Street in New Orleans although it’s not as big. There’s music going on all day and night and the street is blocked off to cars so you can walk around with alcohol if you like. You can get a “Beale Big Ass Beer” to go, or something called a Diver at Silky O’Sullivan’s Irish pub. It’s slogan – “Guaranteed to make you go down!” – is printed on the huge tubs that are used to hold this concoction.

These are the tubs that hold the magical "Diver" concoction.

I saw people everywhere drinking these and then I came across a guy who was drinking one across the street from the restaurant. And by that I mean that everyone connected straws together until it made it across the street and cheered him on once he finally got a sip. A Diver contains beer, liquor, and fruit juice. It sounds disgusting to me but it’s very popular so it must be good…if you’re a college kid or an alcoholic that is. Ew, that was a bit judgmental! What’s wrong with you, Liz? You drank stupid stuff in college once upon a time, too!

A glimpse of Beale Street; where total strangers will help you get wasted.

I hit Dyer’s for a deep-fried cheeseburger. I am easily going to gain 10 pounds on this trip but it will be worth it! Dyer’s has been written up in Esquire as one of the five most decadent burgers in the United States. Maybe it’s because instead of a grill, Dyer’s uses a cast-iron skillet filled with grease. Old grease. They’ve been using the same batch since they opened — in 1912. Dear God, what have I ingested?!

Read more: http://www.esquire.com/dont-miss/better-man-07/60things0507-7#ixzz0QO8eKxKn

I then headed over to King’s Palace Café where the sounds of Ms. Zeno the Louisiana Mojo Queen were wafting from the outdoor café. These two biker couples were having the best time smoking, drinking, and dancing and entertaining the crowd almost as much as Ms. Zeno. I was going to take a picture until I heard the following:

Ms. Zeno: Would anyone like to take a picture with me? If so my son has his camera with him and it costs $10.00.

Female customer: I would. (taking out her camera, obviously missing Ms. Zeno’s caveat)

Ms. Zeno: Oh no honey, only my son takes pictures of me. (big smile) This is a business.

The customer declined. I feel for Ms. Zeno. She was singing her heart out and sounded a lot like Tina Turner. She even had some woman going around trying to sell her CDs, but you know, everyone’s hurting these days and I need my 10 bucks to eat or put gas in the car. I did put a couple bucks in her tip bucket though. It’s the least I could do.

By this time I had my fill of music, museums, and food and headed back to the hotel for some rest. Tomorrow is a visit to the Civil Rights Museum and then a drive to Jackson, Mississippi. Goodnight!

The sun sets both on the Mississippi River and on my time here in Memphis.

DAY 9: Memphis – Where Elvis NEVER leaves the building!

It’s a short drive to Memphis so before I head out, I promised myself I would have breakfast at the famous Loveless Motel and Café. Located off Highway 100, this place has had celebrities travel from all over the country just to have their famous secret recipe biscuits. After all of the complimentary hotel breakfasts that consist of cereal and fruit and doughy bagels, this is a real treat for me. Not that I’m complaining because, hey, free is great! But ever since I was introduced to Frites Cler in Durham, I have been craving some country breakfast and the Loveless Café did not disappoint. As their menu says, it’s “Tide’s favorite place to get a stain!” Of course it’s a bit of a wait for a table but well worth it. While you’re waiting you can sit on the porch and listen to women gossip about their friends or look over the dozens of autographed photos from celebrities of every medium. Check out the website to learn all about their history: www.lovelesscafe.com.

Once I sat down my waitress, Sally, immediately brought me some biscuits with an assortment of homemade jams and I hate to admit this but I’ve never had biscuits with jam; only with butter or sausage gravy. The biscuits were so soft that I wanted to sleep on them. I had the eggs and bacon breakfast platter and a side of grits. I’m not a connoisseur but based on my limited experience, I can confidently say these were the BEST grits I’ve ever had. Believe it or not, I was still hungry so I looked at the menu to see what else I could try.

Me: What’s a hash brown casserole?

Sally: It’s hash browns mixed with onions and cheese and a little bit of sour cream.

Apparently my face must have looked like a little girl on her birthday who just got a pony, an easy-bake oven and every Barbie doll in the world.

Sally: Would you like an order?

Me: Dear Lord, yes please.

Sally (smiling): I think you’ll like it.

And like it I did! It was a little dish of carb-fat heaven and before I was even halfway finished, Sally came by to see if I wanted more biscuits. Ummm…duh! (I responded in a much nicer way than that, I promise.) I wish I were staying another day in Nashville just so I could come back for supper and try the fried chicken. There is no longer a motel at the Loveless, but they do have a country store where you can buy souvenirs and food. Lord knows I don’t need any more stuff but I did try a sample of Piggy Popcorn. It’s caramel popcorn sprinkled with real country smoked bacon bits. Don’t make that face…it’s delicious! The Loveless Café sits at the northern terminus of the Natchez Trace Parkway so there were lots of bikers and cyclists who were carbo-loading before their rides down the parkway. I’m going to hit the southern part of the parkway later on this trip but it would be a great thing to drive the entire 440 miles down this beautiful historic road, especially in the spring or fall.

Now that I’m full it’s time to head off to Memphis. Once again, Tennessee is really a lovely state to drive through and once again, I’m wishing I had more time to spend here and visit the Smoky Mountains. But I bought a ticket to Graceland for today so I need to get moving. Along the way I saw a minivan that was decorated with “Just Married” text all over it, and wouldn’t you know, by the time I got to Graceland, that same minivan was parked in the parking lot! I wonder if they were doing a cross-country honeymoon. I’ll let you know if see them again.

Graceland

So I’m not an Elvis fanatic but I can appreciate his music, especially his earlier stuff and his place in American rock and roll and it seems that if you’re going to be in Memphis, you should really go to Graceland. I mean, for me, this one visit was enough but for others, it may not suffice. Apparently I had just missed “Elvis Week” which takes place during the anniversary of his death (August 16^th) and I’m torn. The tourist part of me is glad that I missed the craziness of that week, but the writer part of me is sad because can you imagine the photos I could have taken and the stories I could tell after talking to some of those Elvis fans?

I opted for the platinum tour because it’s only a few dollars more and you get to see almost everything at Graceland. This place is run like a well-oiled machine. You pick up your ticket and your audio headset and then board a shuttle that takes you across the street to the front door of Graceland. The upstairs is closed off but you get to walk through the dining room, the kitchen, the jungle room and a few other places. Then of course there are the rooms devoted entirely to house his awards and gold records. The audio tour is carefully thought out with a smooth talking narrator that takes you through Elvis’s entire career. Sometimes Lisa Marie will even chime in with a bit of trivia or personal memories. The unfortunate thing is that the décor of the house has been kept intact since Elvis’ death, which was in 1977…not the height of interior decorating. It’s pretty hideous actually.

How the rich and famous decorated in the 1970s.

You get to walk around most of the grounds and eventually end up at Elvis’ gravesite in the meditation garden . There are tombstones for Elvis, his mom, and his dad. There’s even a marker for his twin brother who died at birth. There are tons of flowers and signs at the site that I’m told are sent to Graceland almost every day and they do display them all.

This sampling doesn't even begin to represent the volume of Elvis fan love on display at Graceland.

Now that I’ve seen the mansion, I head over to other parts of Graceland. There’s “Sincerely Elvis” which is devoted entirely to his movie career and houses posters, photos, costumes, clips from his films, even the scripts from the movies. But they also have things like receipts for presents that he bought for the crew. I’m kind of amazed that these things were all saved. Who saved them? Where did they come from? Apparently if you’re going to be this famous, you need to save EVERYTHING and I do mean everything. Even if it’s a freakin’ candy wrapper you put in your pocket in 1972! Then it’s off to Elvis’ car museum to see his collection of cars and motorcycles. He had quite a few including a 1955 pink Cadillac Fleetwood, a 1960 Rolls Royce Silver Cloud and a beautiful purple 1956 purple Cadillac El Dorado. You can also watch a 10-minute montage of Elvis’ films that feature him in cars. As you can gather, no detail has been left to chance and each section of Graceland is attached to a gift shop for your convenience and expense. I’m saving my pennies for souvenirs at Sun Studio tomorrow but let me tell you, they will put Elvis’ name and face on anything in this town!

Next it’s off to see the Elvis’s planes; one is named Lisa Marie and the other is a small jet. Again, the interior of these planes were horrifically decorated in the manner of the decade. The final exhibit included in my package is “Private Presley” which I thought might be some sort of personal look at Elvis, like home movies and love letters to Priscilla, but it’s actually a newer exhibit that details his years when he was in the army. There’s a video of a press conference he held upon his return the U.S. and footage of Priscilla talking about the time they met in Germany while he was on duty. This was actually one of my favorite parts of the tour and I think because it was still in the early part of his career when I liked him best, and before his fame became ridiculous. This was also during the time when his mother died so that part was very touching as well. I can’t imagine ever being that famous (not that I think I have anything to worry about in that department) but I wouldn’t even want to be that famous. It must feel like being in prison in some way. I mean being famous on the level of Elvis or Madonna or Michael Jackson must be very lonely and frustrating. To not be able to walk anywhere without being bothered no matter how well you disguise yourself. I know people make a lot of comparisons between Michael Jackson and Elvis and speaking of Michael Jackson…I went to Graceland on August 29^th, which just happens to be Michael Jackson’s birthday. It was pure coincidence and I didn’t plan it but how odd that I happened to go on this day…Bizarre.

The car, the suit, the records. What more do you need?

Well it took a lot out of me to visit Graceland. You should definitely plan on at least 2-3 hours if not more. After driving all morning, and Graceland all afternoon I am pooped. So it’s off to my La Quinta hotel room, which feels like the freakin’ Plaza Hotel after that crappy Alexis Inn at stayed at in Nashville. Goodnight and pleasant dreams!

DAY 8: Where I got to sing at the Grand Ole Opry

OK, I “sort of” sang at the Grand Ole Opry…I’ll explain in a bit. After a brief workout in the hotel’s tiny fitness center and an unpleasant continental breakfast, I couldn’t wait to get on with my tourist activities for the day. First stop, the Grand Ole Opry. Now I’m not a huge country music fan. Oh, there are a few songs and artists I enjoy and I greatly appreciate the rock and roll artists like Johnny Cash and Elvis Presley who incorporate their roots of country, gospel and R&B into their music but I’m a country music novice. One trip to Nashville and I have a whole new appreciation for this genre. http://www.opry.com/

Grand indeed!

For those of you like myself who really don’t know anything about this institution, the Grand Ole Opry is the longest running radio show in history (since 1925) and they still broadcast live to this day. The auditorium is gorgeous and has gone through several locations before landing at this final stop on Opryland Drive where the speed limit is 24 mph. Isn’t that an odd number? I think so, too. Our tour guide, Melissa, was as sweet as could be and took us through the 4,400 seat theater and the backstage area. Before I started the tour, I spent some time in the Grand Ole Opry museum where I got to learn a lot about the history of the Opry, watch videos of performances, and see display cases filled with artifacts and costumes from people like Roy Acuff, Patsy Cline, and Minnie Pearl. So I was very proud when Melissa quizzed our tour group.

Melissa: OK y’all now this is the artists’ entrance to the Opry and the first picture you see is a painting of this gentleman right here. Does anyone know who this is?

Me (with raised hand): Roy Acuff!

Melissa: That’s right! He joined the Opry in 1938 and was one of the earliest and most influential members of the Opry so that’s why his is the first picture that the musicians see when they enter the building. Now outside you’ll see a sculpture of a little girl that was donated by Sarah Cannon. Does anyone know who that is?

Me (with raised hand): Minnie Pearl!

Melissa: That’s correct! Very good. After she died, her estate donated it to the Opry. And back here is a soundstage. Do you know which television variety show was filmed here beginning in 1969?

Me (with raised hand): Hee Haw!

Melissa: That’s right, “Hee Haw” began filming here on June 15, 1969.

Melissa seems pleased but I sense the group is going to turn on me for being a know-it-all so I chilled out on the rest of the questions. The tour continues with the post office area where Opry members have mailboxes to receive their fan mail. Then we move on to the dressing room area. The dressing rooms are decorated in various themes and there is no dressing room #13 for superstitious reasons of course. Dressing room #1 was Roy Acuff’s dressing room and we learned that he had a policy of leaving his dressing room door open at all times so that people could come by and say hello and visit with him. So now, it is Opry policy that anyone, and I mean anyone who is assigned that dressing room while they are playing at the Opry has to keep that same open-door policy. Melissa informs us that Vince Gill is often assigned dressing room #1 because he likes keeping the door open as well.

The final stop on the tour is the stage itself. At any given radio show, there can be up to 80 performers gracing the stage. Gaining membership to the Opry is a huge honor and there is no one particular way to become a member. It doesn’t matter how many times you’ve played at the Opry or how many records you’ve sold. It is all based on the relationship that you build over time with the Opry and the decision is made exclusively by the Opry management. Once you’re a member you make a commitment to play at the Opry a certain amount of times each year. We’re told that the Opry membership is really like a big family and that the stars love to hang out with each other and shoot the breeze in the green room before the show.  And during a show, you are absolutely allowed and encouraged to go up to the stage and take pictures of the performers (just no video) and you can also hand the announcer a note if you have some special occasion you’re celebrating or other announcement you want to broadcast and he will say it live on the air for you. It sounds like a fun time and believe it or not, I would actually like to attend a broadcast there some time.

At center stage, there is a large circular piece of wood that was taken from the old Ryman Auditorium, the former home of the Opry. This preserves the venue’s history and reminds the performers of the long association with the Ryman. Melissa asked if anyone wanted to sing a song on the stage but everyone was shy and while I have no problem answering questions, my singing voice is fair at best. This young girl was having a birthday and her father let us all know that much to her dismay. She was a teenager so, naturally, she was embarrassed when Melissa led us all in a rendition of “Happy Birthday” to her but as Melissa put it, “Now you can all say that you sang on the stage of the Grand Ole Opry.” We then had a few minutes to take pictures and the best part was this one guy who brought his guitar pick on stage. After his wife took his picture, he yelled “Yee haw” and rubbed his guitar pick all over the microphone on center stage. He was happier than a pig in shit!

L: The famous Ryman circle in the stage. R: The quote that christened the "Grand Ole Opry".

Ryman Auditorium

The next stop was the Ryman Auditorium. http://www.ryman.com/. I wasn’t sure if I wanted to go on another tour of country music hall because the Opry was pretty extensive but I decided to go at the last minute and I’m glad I did. The Ryman is a beautiful space with church-like pew seating and it really does feel very holy to be inside of it. Well, I shouldn’t be surprised. It is called “The Mother Church of Country Music” after all. Aside from the significance of the music that’s played there and events like the first time Johnny Cash met June Carter at this place, I’m told the acoustics here are second only to the Mormon Tabernacle and even surpass Carnegie Hall. I believe it, and would love to go to a concert here. It was first called the Union Gospel Tabernacle and was built by Nashville riverboat Captain Thomas Green Ryman who wanted to build a tabernacle to serve the city’s evangelist revivals. It opened in 1892 and was home to many lectures, revivals, and classical performances. In 1943, the Grand Ole Opry needed a home and moved to the Ryman Auditorium where it stayed until 1974. Although the Opry does move back to the Ryman for broadcasting during the Christmas holidays when the Rockettes take over the Grand Ole Opry at its current location. From 1974 until 1992, the auditorium sat vacant and fell into disrepair, until Emmylou Harris held a series of concerts there and, thank goodness, it renewed interesting in restoring the theater and it is now a historic landmark.

The Mother Church of Country Music!

After watching a short video, it was time for the backstage tour. Now Melissa at the Grand Ole Opry was great but let me tell you, Art, our tour guide at the Ryman was hands down one of the best tour guides I’ve ever had the pleasure of listening to. Aside from his lovely drawl, he is incredibly knowledgeable and you can tell it comes from a place of true love for both country music and the history of the Ryman. He said his tours always go into overtime because he “just gets so excited talkin’ about this place!” The only downside of the Ryman tour is that you’re not allowed to take any pictures backstage because of copyright material. The halls are adorned with so many photographs and posters of the history of its musicians that it’s hard to remember everything Art told us. He also liked to quiz us on our country music history knowledge but it was here that I met my match. Unlike the Opry, I was pretty clueless and only one woman in the group could really answer any of the questions. She was from Alabama and “raised on the Opry” so she had an unfair albeit charming advantage. One dressing room is called “the women of country” and was adorned with pictures of Patsy Cline, Loretta Lynn, Tammy Wynette and many others. My favorite moment:

Art: And there you’ll see a picture of Tammy Wynette. Of course she had a lot of big hits, ladies and gentlemen, but you all know one of her most famous ones is “Stand By Your Man”. And ladies…she stood by five of them!

Oh, Art, if I was 30 years older I’d ask you to supper! He then showed us the entrance for the artists, which, unlike the beautiful, majestic entrance at the Opry, this entrance is actually an alleyway. I guess it keeps the musicians humble! We ended the tour on the stage again and I took some pictures before heading out. If you ever find yourself in Nashville, a visit to the Ryman is well worth the trip and be sure to ask for a tour with Art. I’m telling you, he is the best! Wait for him, and if he’s not there, go back another day when he is working.

The Nashville Bars and Food

By now it was mid-afternoon and the humidity was really kicking in. I decided to walk down by the Parthenon and check out a few places that my friend Blue recommended. She is a Nashville native and her parents still live there. She even gave me their number and a number of a friend of hers in case I needed it while I was there. That’s the southern hospitality for you. But seriously, once again, my friends are just amazing! I’m so lucky. Now Blue suggested I go to Hillsboro Pike as it’s the cool area of Nashville with lots of cute places to shop and eat but there was just no time to do everything. I ended up walking down to Centennial Park to see their replica of the Parthenon. Nashville is known as the Athens of the south. Well I always forget that walking 10-15 blocks in any other city is not the same as walking 10-15 blocks in NYC but it was great exercise. Unfortunately, by the time I got there, the inside of the building was closed. That’s the problem with leaving some things up to chance. But I got to take some pictures of the outside and the park itself is really quite beautiful. Then I stopped by the Elliston Place Soda Shop (recommended by Blue) but it was closed as well. Luckily, her other recommendation, Rotiers, was very close by so I stopped in there for a beer. Now Blue insisted I have a burger there and they do have the best burgers in the city but folks, I am maxed out on burgers and really need to save my appetite for some barbecue from Jack’s which came highly recommended by everyone I asked when I was searching for barbecue. I did however try some fried pickles. I know it sounds gross, but I’m telling you, they were delicious and you know, “when in Rome…”. Whole dill pickles deep-fried and served with remoloude sauce. Mmm-mmm. I guess you can deep fry just about anything, can’t you? Jacob the owner’s son waited on me personally and when I told him I was going to Jack’s he gave me a sample of Rotier’s barbecue just so I could compare the two. That’s how freakin’ nice everyone is down here. He even called a cab for me and the cab driver who was born and raised in Nashville, gave me a brief history of some of the buildings we passed along the way back downtown to 5^th and Broadway. Hmm, maybe that’s why I felt so at home: Broadway and numbered streets! But I will tell you, not since I was in Dublin, Ireland have I been treated to such kindness and storytelling from a cab driver.

Nashville is, of course, known as Music City and I just had enough time to experience the tip of the iceberg. Friday night was hopping as it is in pretty much any big city. The nice thing about Nashville is that there is live music always playing somewhere in the city. I pretty much stayed in the 5-block area of Broadway between 1^st and 5^th Avenue. Every bar I stopped at had a band near the front door playing everything from country to rock to blues and a doorman who will not charge you a cover but will try to entice you to come in. And all of the bands work for tips so be sure to bring a few bucks to throw in their jars. Legends had album covers all over the walls and 45’s underneath the glass on the bar counter, not to mention the cutest damn cowboy I’ve ever seen. Actually he was a lead singer for the band but he personally came around to collect tips and shook my hand. Every girl in the place was all over him, hugging him, getting her picture taken with him and he was eating it up. Next I stopped at Roberts where a band was playing some great blues and its unique décor was an entire wall lined with cowboy boots. Then I stopped in Layla’s Bluegrass Inn for hillbilly and country music and a nice cold Budwesier. U.S. license plates and posters of country music stars adorned the walls. I asked the waitress who was playing.

Waitress (with great uncertainty): Umm, I’m not 100% sure honey but I THINK it’s Scott Eisengall and the Ale Loving Band.

Good enough for me. They had a nice banter with each other between sets and played songs like Johnny Russell’s “Red neck, white socks, and blue ribbon beer”. See? I’m becoming an aficionado already! Actually, I just looked it up on Google. Sorry to disappoint you. Next I stopped at Jack’s for the highly recommended barbecue. I had the Tennessee Pork Shoulder Sandwich with a side of macaroni and cheese, baked beans, and creamy corn. Once again, a memorable and delicious meal! http://www.jacksbarbque.com/

How Nashville does Broadway Street!

Now that I had my fill of food, I stopped at Stages for some country music and people were dancing like crazy. There was one long-legged guy there who had moves I’ve never seen before. He was fantastic; so smooth and confident and he could twirl the girls around like nobody’s business.

See that guy in the white hat? He danced with EVERY girl in the bar! Well, not me, (I was too scared of his moves) but almost every girl.

My final stop was Tootsie’s which I was told I HAD to see but to be honest it was so packed that I could barely make it inside and then a young girl was pulled up on stage while the band and the entire bar sang happy birthday to her. Then I walked down Broadway to check out some souvenir shops and boot stores and I stumbled upon the Charlie Daniels gift store and museum. Although I’m not in the market for cowboy boots, I was tempted to buy some. I wanted to walk down by the river but apparently there was a BBQ festival going on. If only I had known earlier!  By this time I was ready to call it a night. The nice thing about traveling on your own is that you can do pretty much what you want and you can pack a lot into a day. The bad news is…you’re by yourself. It would have been great to be there with someone and hang out for a while but hopefully I’ll have a chance to come back here again. One day is not enough time but I’m completely charmed by Nashville. Thanks for the hospitality y’all. Next stop: Memphis!

DAY 7: Ma’am is not an insult down south

Leslie and I got our yummy Havarti Bagels at Flat Rock Bakery before I headed back out on the highway. I’m actually getting used to being called ma’am down here. I don’t know why, but in New York, whenever anyone calls me ma’am, I get very offended and it makes me feel old. But down south, it’s a term of endearment and respect. It’s just the way it is down here and they may think of you as an older woman when they say it but there is no malice or insult behind it. It actually feels kind of nice. It’s like when you’re in Italy and all of the guys call you “bella”. Sure they’re probably thinking dirty thoughts but it sounds so much nicer in Italian.

My next stop is Nashville, Tennesse a.k.a. Music City. The drive along I-40 is really beautiful for the first couple of hours as I drive through parts of the Great Smoky Mountains. This is definitely a moment when I regret that I don’t have more time to spend exploring the Smoky Mountain parks. Even squeezing in a trip to Dollywood would be kitschy and fun (as my friend Steven says, the souvenirs would be worth the trip alone!). There’s a stretch of highway that literally just winds back and forth for about an hour and it makes me feel like I’m on a roller coaster. It’s tricky when you’re alone because you want to keep looking at the landscape but you have to pay extra attention to the road! The mountains are stunning and completely covered with big bushy trees. There are so many trees that it looks like a giant shag carpet that you could run your fingers through (but much prettier than shag!). The mountain ranges gradually turn different shades of blue and green as they go back towards the horizon. It’s really breathtaking. I was hoping there would be a scenic overlook along the way so I could stop at to take a photo but no such luck. This is why I highly recommend if you’re going to travel through this area that you make time to stop at the national park. I must come back here again some day. Since I don’t have a picture, I found this link to Wikipedia that will give you an idea: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Great_Smoky_Mountains.

So I know I mentioned my friend Keith on the Day 4 entry but I have to give him another shout out. Keith is a friend of mine from the improv community. Not only is he a great improviser but he’s also an awesome photographer. I had finally reached my threshold of music for a while and listened to the hours of comedy mp3’s he gave me. KEITH…YOU ARE A LIFE SAVER!  He’s the second person who warned me that I would need a break from music and thankfully he came through. I rarely listen to comedy stuff but now I’m thinking of building upon this collection that Keith has so kindly started for me. Thanks, Keith! You rock and I am now a big Mike Birbiglia fan!

Along this drive I see lots of those blue signs for “Attractions” or “Local Attractions”. You know the ones I’m talking about? They’re usually with the food, gas, and lodging signs. I keep waiting for a really interesting or weird one so that I can take a spontaneous detour on this trip but I have yet to be inspired enough to pull over. I have a problem with these signs because my definition of an “Attraction” seems to be quite different than that of the U.S. Highway System’s definition. I tend to side with Webster on this one. An attraction is: a person or thing that draws, attracts, allures, or entices or an entertainment offered to the public. I want a sign for the largest ball of twine, or Mr. Heckle’s Giant House of Fun, or an interesting art sculpture. Even a nature preserve, or a place of historical significance or something folksy like Mama Jones’ Country Store would be kind of cool, but no. The U.S. Highway System has a broad definition of the word that may include the aforementioned items but probably not. Note to the U.S. Department of Transportation…an attraction is NOT: a golf course, a shopping outlet, a crab shack restaurant (unless actual crabs are serving you food, then that’s kind of cool), a fruit stand, an RV parking lot, a boat rental park, a country club, or an Off-Track Betting (OTB) place. Well, you will probably see some interesting characters at an OTB so that would be an attraction in and of itself. OK, I’ll give you that one, but it just barely qualifies!

Well, that’s it for today. Sorry no pictures or anything terribly interesting but I need to rest up for my tour of Nashville tomorrow!

DAY 6: Liz takes a tumble!

I was originally going to visit the Biltmore estate today which, apparently, is “the” thing to do while you’re here: http://www.biltmore.com/

It’s basically a castle that was built by the Vanderbilts and it’s insanely grandiose and beautiful. They have horseback riding and boat trips and at the moment, they have this exhibit called the Flower Carpet which is this intricately designed bed of flowers that is supposed to be amazing. However, it costs $55.00 to visit this place even if you just want to walk around the grounds and not even go inside. I’m sure it’s worth it but I have to be selective. I still have to visit Graceland, the Grand Canyon, and Napa Valley! So then I thought I would maybe visit Triple Falls nearby and take more pictures of waterfalls. But that was before my grand fall!

Leslie and I decided to hike up Big Glassy Mountain (which always sounds like Big Lassie Mountain when you say it) for some exercise and it was really great. We ran into lots of fellow hikers and it was quite a workout. Leslie mentioned that the film “Last of the Mohicans” was filmed in this area so we started making fun of that really melodramatic seen where Daniel Day-Lewis vows to come back for Madeline Stowe. “I WILL FIND YOU! WHATEVER IT TAKES! I WILL FIND YOU!” One minute we were laughing about that and the next thing I knew I took this nasty spill on the path. I managed to trip on something (I don’t know what…a tree root, some rocks, who knows?) and I took a really big fall. It was the kind of fall that happens faster than your mind can comprehend it and when it’s over, you have that residual shaky feeling and rapid heartbeat as you replay it in your mind and realize how much worse it could have been. My travel mug of coffee went flying and so did I. Luckily, no broken bones and I didn’t hit my head or my face but I scraped up my right leg something fierce and have a couple of cuts on my left hand. God knows it could have been worse, I mean could you imagine if I had broken something and had to either deal with it the rest of the trip or worse, cancel it altogether? I would have been pissed. I’m OK…just really, really sore so I decided to take it easy for the rest of the day and catch up on writing and stuff. Leslie did say it was quite a sight to see and that I landed just like you’re supposed to do in stage combat which is funny since I’ve never taken a stage combat class in my life but apparently I’m a natural. Too bad we didn’t capture this Kodak moment on film!

Leslie has a matinee this afternoon as well as a show tonight so I spent the afternoon planning my next stop (Nashville) and did some laundry. Must take advantage of that whenever I can! Then I went to Black Bear Café to write where once again, the kindness and hospitality of the local clerks is quite comforting. I don’t mean to go on because it’s not like the clerks aren’t nice in New York, especially now that the economy is so bad. Sometimes I go into a store and I feel like the clerk is about to offer to wipe my ass. But in a small town it seems extremely genuine and natural and it makes me want to be a kinder,  person. I hope I can hang onto that feeling for the rest of the trip and when I return home.

Tonight I saw Leslie’s show. She is the female lead in a new play called “Real Estate” by Canadian playwright Allana Harkin, that is making its American premiere at the Flat Rock Playhouse:  http://www.flatrockplayhouse.org/

Leslie was FANTASTIC! But if you know Leslie then I’m sure you’re not surprised. She is such a funny, talented actress and is one of those people that feels so at home when she’s on stage; at least it seems that way to me. The show is a romantic comedy about a man who is going through a divorce and needs to sell his house. Leslie is the real estate agent handling the sale and she gets to showcase all of her acting and comedic talents as the character Emma Bark slowly unravels and then does everything she can to make the sale happen. I don’t want to give away the ending but it’s a sweet play and the cast is great. BTW, Flat Rock Playhouse is a GORGEOUS theater and they have a huge audience base. During intermission this very nice older gentleman struck up a conversation with me and I told him that I was friends with Leslie.

“Oh she’s really good,” he said.

“Yes, I know. We perform in an improv group together back in New York City.”

“Well, maybe next year you should come down here and perform at the Flat Rock,” he said.

If only it were that simple, I thought!

After the show we went to a wine bar called the Back Room where it was open mic night. It was pretty packed and filled with lots of college-aged, crunchy, granola kids. Leslie and I do not know where they come from but they were all there to support each other’s acts as they play their hard rock and folk guitar. Our personal favorite was the band of older gentlemen who played bluegrass music. Our poor waitress was the only one on staff and our food took forever. She ended up giving us half off on our food but then forgot to give me my change. At first I thought it was because she was the only one on staff, but now I think that she is just a sweet waitress who’s not all there. But despite that, it was a lovely way to the end the evening. My leg is still “smarting” from the fall, but hopefully it will be fine in a couple of days.  Tomorrow, it’s off to Nashville, the Music City!

DAY 5: Apples, mountains, and goats! Oh my!

Today is packed with stuff to do. First, Leslie took me to the Flat Rock Bakery where we had Havarti Cheese Bagels with cream cheese freshly baked that morning. New York has got some great bagels, but these could certainly hold their own against Zabar’s or Murray’s, my friend!

Next we ventured off to Sky Top Orchard for apple picking and thankfully we arrived early enough to avoid the crowds and the hot weather. I have never been apple picking. Maybe I went blueberry picking as a child but I honestly can’t remember. Anyway, it’s a really fun thing to do. Each week or so, there are new varieties of apples that are in season and this week we got to pick Ginger Golds, Macintosh, and Gala apples. They charge by the basket (or peck if you want to use professional apple picking lingo) so all you have to do is fill up your basket and you’re good to go. Leslie, an experienced apple picker herself, gives me the essential tips. It’s best to go further back along the rows because those apples are less picked over and if you’re tall enough or have one of those apple picker devices, you will really strike gold because the apples at the top or the best. I asked Leslie to make an instructional video on the subject which I promise is coming soon but my video software on my laptop is acting up. Seriously, please check back to see this video or look for it on Facebook in a couple of weeks. It’s delightful and educational.

They also had grapes for the picking and these were the bluest purplish grapes I have ever seen. Incredibly tart and juicy. I will have plenty of fruit for the rest of my trip now. We paid for our pickings, drank some fresh cider and took a couple of goofy pics before heading out to downtown. We basically needed to kill time until our reservations at Chimney Rock at 3 p.m.

We walked around downtown to window shop and then stopped back at Kilwell’s so that Leslie could visit her friend Janie B who worked there. Janie is a lovely 60-year-old woman and the kind of person that will give you a hug the first time she meets you. She ended up treating us to some fudge and goodies which I could not get over. Who does that for someone they just met? Janie does, that’s who! It’s the kind of hospitality that you expect down south but still can’t believe it when you encounter it. Another cool thing going on downtown is apples, or more specifically apple sculptures which are dotted along main street in honor of the upcoming apple festival.

How do you like them apples?

Next it was off to see goats! I forgot to mention that Flat Rock Playhouse is right across the street from the Carl Sandburg house. For those of you who don’t know, Mr. Sandburg is a famous American poet and he also wrote a lot of American folk songs too; the names of which are escaping me at the moment but Leslie knows a couple. Leslie, what was that song you were singing, again? Well Carl Sandburg’s house is not only a place where you can learn all about him (which I obviously didn’t) but it’s also on the way to the top of Big Glassy Mountain which is a hike Leslie and I will take tomorrow. There’s also a working goat farm which stinks like crazy but has some really adorable goats and baby goats that you can go and pet if you want. They even butt heads with each other in a playful manner. And the farm is kind enough to have a Purell dispenser at the gate so that you can wash your hands when you leave. In fact, they kind of insist on it. My germophobic mother would be proud!

Leslie once played the role of Snow White at Disneyland. I think she was perfectly cast! Meanwhile, I almost want to see if my building allows goats as pets...almost!

After hitting the local Kmart so that I could buy some socks (yet another thing I forgot to pack. I don’t know where my head is sometimes!) we decided to get lunch and Leslie had specifically waited for my arrival to take me to the best burger place in town. It’s called Harry’s but my understanding is that some of the locals call it Piggy’s. I guess because you pig out here? It’s a funky little place with restaurant memorabilia on the outside like the KFC colonel and the Big Boy statues and license plates from all over the U.S. adorn the walls. There’s even a jail which I was dying to get my picture taken in from the inside, but we weren’t allowed in. And let me tell you, these burgers did not disappoint. They were freakin’ delicious!

Funky decor at Harry's (aka Piggy's)

Finally we head off to Chimney Rock which is an amazing place. You drive up this winding road that takes forever (or at least feels like it takes forever). Leslie managed to score us free admission to this place. I’m telling you, you will not go wrong with Leslie Collins as your hostess! We decide to take the elevator up to the top and then hike our way down. The elevator lets you off right inside the Chimney Rock gift shop (just like at Disney World!) but we head straight for the lookout point. From an elevation of 2,280 feet you can see the Blue Ridge mountains and miles of beautiful country! It’s quite breathtaking once you get over the initial nervousness of being up that high and climbing the wooden stairs to the top of the peak. Why is it that it’s scarier to go up stairs at places like this then it is to go down? Leslie thinks it’s because you can’t see ahead to where you’re going to end up  and I think she might be right. After taking in the views, we headed to the opera box which is a rock formation that looks like an opera box. Sometimes there’s no hidden meaning, folks! From inside the opera box you can see more of the same wonderful views as long as you watch your head! It’s kind of like being in a basement apartment in Queens! After that we were going to go up to another elevated point but I chickened out. More stairs up several flights which made me too nervous. So we headed back down hickory nut trail so that we could find the waterfalls. On the way, we passed John Mason who is a local dulcimer musician. I know, I’ve never heard of him either but I imagine he’s quite well-known in these parts since he had a few fans talking to him as we passed by. We got on Hickory Nut Trail for a good 15-20 minutes of wooded terrain which really worked our quads. Once we hit the waterfalls, we had a chance to rest and enjoy the cool temperatures and serene sounds of the waterfall. I’m still learning how to use this fancy-ass camera I bought. In many ways, it does the work for you, but there are so many settings to try and I still need to learn about basic photographic elements like f-stops and apertures and ISO speeds and when to use a neutral gradient density filter. One day it will all click (no pun intended)…I hope. We took a different route back to the parking lot and along the way we passed Moonshiner’s Cave which houses an actual moonshine still. Unfortunately, you can’t go down very far into the cave but it’s another nice cool respite along the way. We worked up quite a sweat in the Carolina heat! I know the following pictures don’t do it justice but here’s a few shots to give you an idea and perhaps inspire you to go to Chimney Rock and see it in person:

We headed back to the playhouse where Leslie had to attend a cocktail party for some of the local patrons. I opted to chill out for a bit and then we went to see a movie. I know, why do I keep going to movies? Well, they’re cheaper outside of New York so why not take advantage of it? We saw “Cheri” a little independent film by Stephen Frears which starred Michelle Pfeiffer as a cougarish prostitute in 19^th century France. The costumes were great but the story (by Colette) was depressing so be forewarned if you rent this one. The cool thing about the Flat Rock cinema (aside from the fact that you can enjoy a nice glass of wine or beer while you watch the film) is that half of the theater has movie theater seats and the other half has tables and chairs. Sitting in that section made me feel like I was in a screening room. Makes me want to open a movie theater just like it in New York. Then again, I can just see people hanging around long after the film is over and trying to kick them out. What a pain in the ass that would be.

After the movie, more hanging out on the porch with wine, cheese, and the apples we picked that day. Then later in the evening some of the other staff set up a bonfire so we hung out there. Again, I haven’t done that in ages and it really felt good. So nice to just sit around and shoot the shit with a beer or two while someone plays guitar and sings. Leslie works with some very funny people and there are a lot of young kids who are apprenticing there and of course, they just want to get blitzed and have fun. Ah, I remember that time so well. One girl was incredibly drunk and fell off of her log pretty damn hard. Luckily she was OK and once that was established we knew it was fine to laugh but I know she will be feeling the bruises and the hangover tomorrow. Until then…

DAY 4: Hendersonville – A Slice of Americana

Start Mileage: 18,701

I headed out on I-85 south towards Hendersonville, NC to visit my dear friend and improv teammate Leslie Collins. Leslie is doing a show called “Real Estate” at the Flat Rock Playhouse in Hendersonville, which I will get to see on Wednesday night. My friends are truly awesome. Before I left Durham, Colie and Jen bought me a travel mug from Joe Van Gogh because they knew I would need to be caffeinated for this entire trip. And Leslie was able to score me one of the artist apartments to stay in for the entire time. To top it off, my friend Keith Huang gave me a hours and hours of comedy mp3’s; everything from Robin Williams, to Patton Oswalt, to Mike Birbglia and so on. My friends rock with a capital “R”!

The drive to Hendersonville took about 4 hours and it became quite clear to me that I was entering Jesus country with the abundance of signs and crosses that I saw along the highway. I am also in “country” country and by that I mean, country music as it blares from just about every radio station on the dial. And not only that, it appears I am also in race car country as I see signs for raceways and other NASCAR attractions. I stopped at a McDonald’s that even had a race car motif and was located at the corner of Fireball Roberts (race car legend) Avenue and Bruton Smith (owner/CEO of Speedway Motorsports) Boulevard. The rest of the drive was fairly uneventful until I sank below a quarter tank of gas. Suddenly my quiet dashboard began lighting up to let me know that I had about 30 miles left before I would run out of gas. I mean it was visually screaming at me! Now I was actually about 10 minutes away from the exit to Leslie’s place but since I was driving through hills and this thing kept glaring at me, I began to get nervous and stopped as soon as I could to fill up my tank. Across the street from the gas station was an antique/thrift store called Southern Blessings and I couldn’t resist stopping in for a moment. They had really amazing lamps from the 1950s and even an old phonograph from the 1940s that still worked and if I had the money and means to buy it, I would have. Then again, where would I store the damn thing in my meager apartment? It turns out that Southern Blessings is a transitional home for women recently released from the Blue Ridge Prison which helps these women get back on their feet. I know this because Donna, the blond sales clerk with too much eyeliner told me all about it. She is one of those women I just described and to quote her, “she couldn’t be happier thank the Lord” that she has this opportunity to work at Southern Blessings. I truly do think organizations like this are wonderful and I wanted to contribute in some way but after looking around for a while I couldn’t find ANYTHING I really wanted. Although the homemade jams with the “Jesus Saves” labels on them were tempting! Donna kept coming over to make sure I knew about all of the stuff they had and to see if I needed any help because she was trying to make a sale so that she could have money to buy her medicine. Donna is an open book in case you hadn’t guessed and now I’m starting to feel guilty because apparently they work on some type of commission here at Southern Blessings. But part of me is also feeling like I’m getting the “hard sell” from Donna too. I ended up buying some $2.00 souvenir trinket which I can’t imagine helps Donna much but hopefully it will get her one day closer to getting her back on her feet. I hope I don’t sound insensitive because I do believe that this country and our government could do a lot more to help people in Donna’s situation and I can’t imagine going through what she has been through. I’m sure it’s not the last time on this trip that I will appreciate how lucky I am.

I paid for my purchase and headed back on I-85. Within moments, I arrived at the Flat Rock Playhouse and found Ms. Collins. Leslie showed me to my lodgings in the Elizabeth C. Stafford Artist Housing which is a two story building filled with one-room studios that each have a microwave, refrigerator, bathroom, and a bed and a desk. And free Internet access! Each floor has a screened-in porch where you can hang out and it reminds me of something out of “Dirty Dancing”. Leslie soon informs me that the first (and BEST) “Dirty Dancing” movie was filmed not too far from here but, sadly, has since burned down. As I pull up, I ask one of the guys hanging outside if he knows where I can find Leslie Collins. “Nope. I don’t even know who that is.” How can anyone here not know Leslie? It’s impossible! Once I get settled, Leslie and I head into the downtown area for a glass of wine and snacks at Vue Wine Bar. We catch up for a bit and then walk around the downtown area, which is a slice of Americana. Kilwell’s chocolate shop, a toy store, a general store with all kinds of sundries and a fountain shop; as well as stores that feature items made by local artists. It really is a quaint and welcoming place. We arrive in the main square just in time for Monday night dancing in the streets. In the summertime, every Monday, there is clogging and square dancing at the gazebo downtown. Professional dancers do the clogging complete with matching outfits and they are quite good. The square dancing is open to all but Leslie and I are not well versed enough in the nuances of this art form to participate. People bring chairs and hang out to watch and listen to the music, while folks of all ages join in on the dancing and it’s really a sight to see. We head back to the playhouse and hang out on the porch with a glass of wine before calling it a night. I love the city but I can understand the appeal of small town like this where everyone is friendly and life is a little more peaceful and simple.

From L to R: Me, the band, and Leslie!

DAY 3: Ouch! My thighs are chafing!

Sunday morning was just as peaceful as Saturday and Colie, Jen, and I decided to take the 2-hour drive to the beach. We stopped at Joe Van Gogh for some coffee and bagels. Joe Van Gogh is one of those cool hip college coffee places that have organic fair trade coffee and encourage you to bring your own travel mug to save the earth and a few pennies off the price of your cup of joe. The coffee was delicious and the counter man was dreadlocked and laid back. I don’t know what hipster college kids do on their coffee breaks now but in my day, they would kick back, spark a doob or a cig, fill up on coffee and kick the hackey sack around for a bit. Perhaps times have changed.

We then headed downtown to look at some of the cool older buildings in Durham as well as the renovated sections downtown that they’re turning into lofts and offices. I guess that happens in every town these days, not just New York City. We hit the American Tobacco Historic section where you can see lots of signs for Bull Durham cigarettes and the Lucky Strike towers. The old brick warehouses have those great signs that are painted on the side of the building and take up the entire five or six stories. I love these old buildings and wish more of them were being preserved. Or at the very least, I wish they still made red brick buildings with the company or factory name painted on the side of the building. The downtown area that they are revitalizing is really beautiful with lots of pretty flowers and small rivers and waterfalls. There are plenty of cafes, bars, and restaurants, and plenty of places to hang outdoors or hear some free concerts in the summer time.

Flowers and buildings of Durham

And of course, we walked by the brand spankin’ new Durham Athletic Park, home to the Durham Bulls minor league baseball team. Yep, the same one that was in the 1988 movie “Bull Durham”. It’s one of the few movies that I can stand Kevin Costner in. Tim Robbins is hysterical and Susan Sarandon is at her gorgeous, sexy forty-something self. It’s a great film that I’m sure you’ve all seen but it’s worth seeing again and if you haven’t seen it…I demand you put it in your Netflix queue immediately! The baseball field we were at however is a new one that they built a few years ago and not the same one that was in the film. The old field has since been abandoned but they did keep the big wooden bull that still blows smoke and whose eyes turn red whenever a baseball hits it…just like in the film.

The Durham Bull. Don't make him angry. You wouldn't like him when he's angry!

We drove through a section of town known as Black Wall Street; home to several black entrepreneurs in the early decades of the 1900s. Then it was off to Wrightsville Beach on the Atlantic coast and home to Cape Fear. Yes, THAT Cape Fear made famous in not one but two movies. While the Scorcese remake may be a little more graphic, I still say the original one with Robert Mitchum and Gregory Peck is ten times scarier!

So while I did bring a bathing suit with me on this trip, I stupidly left it at Colie and Jen’s apartment. What the hell is my problem? I think in the back of my mind, I thought there would be a possibility that the currents would be too rough from the after effects of Hurricane Bill and we would not be allowed to swim in the ocean. Oh let’s face it, I’m grasping at straws here. I’m just an idiot; I admit it. At first I was content to just sit on the beach and read but after wading in the water, it felt so amazing that I just had to pick up some cheap shorts at Johnnie Mercer’s Bait Shop. Now that I was covered head to toe in shorts, tshirt and bra, I ventured into the ocean and it felt fantastic! While I looked silly, I was well covered which is good. I am cursed with pale Irish skin that can burn in a matter of minutes. Especially in these global warming times. But don’t envy me. While I may not get skin cancer, pale white skin against the gleam of the sun kissed waters is not the prettiest sight.  But it never fails, I always forget to put sun block on the damn tops of my feet and they are now burnt to a crisp. OK, so I don’t know what happened between the bait shop and the ocean because the shorts seemed to fit fine when I tried them on at the store. But after being in the ocean for an hour, they started to ride up really high on my legs and rubbed against my thighs so hard that they are now chafed and red! I love going to the beach but sometimes, it doesn’t love me:(

There is nothing like being in the ocean. The salt air, the sand which lovingly exfoliates your skin, the water which cradles you and then picks you up and throws you down when a rough tide comes in. Not to mention how amazingly soft and curly my hair is afterwards. It’s invigorating and healing. And while I imagine that the beaches of Miami or Rio are filled with the most amazing, model-perfect bodies, here on Wrightsville Beach there is no judgment. Oh sure, there are young 20-somethings bronzing their cellulite-free and perfectly toned bodies, but there are also 50-year-old biker folks with leathered skin that has seen way too many rays and cigarettes as well as other pasty faced folks like myself. And even some ample women spilling out of their bathing suits but they don’t seem to care and neither does anyone else. I love the attitude of beach towns. Everyone is here to relax and kick back, people let people be, and you can go shirtless and shoeless in many places. You can be half-naked and not feel the least bit self-conscious. I saw a young woman riding her bike in nothing but a bikini and no one batted an eye, but if any of you guys reading this want to take a moment to picture this image, please feel free…are you picturing it? Are you done yet? Almost finished? How about now? OK, I’m moving on and you’ll just have to catch up with me later.

After a long day of driving and swimming and sunning, we headed home to finish off the wine and some mozzarella and tomato and basil from the farmer’s market. It’s so nice to just relax and talk with friends about all kinds of topics both serious and light. Just to connect with people can be so difficult in the hectic pace of New York City. We really must take more time for these kinds of activities in the city. OK, I’m off to get a good night’s sleep before my drive to Hendersonville. Thanks for a great time Colie and Jen! You gals are the best:)

Colie and Jen!

DAY 2: I’d like a pile of food, topped with more piles of food, and then another pile of food, with a pile of food on the side, please!

Today I woke up to the sound of cicadas doing whatever it is they do to make noise. It’s kind of cool. It starts off as a faint buzz and gradually increases in volume. The whole sound lasts a total of about 10 seconds. I don’t know if they’re entertaining themselves or just having a conversation but it is oddly serene.

First on the agenda was breakfast of course and I have to say, no one does breakfast like the south. Oh sure if you want a fancy eggs benedict with smoked salmon and rich hollandaise sauce followed by several mimosas, New York has got you covered. But if you want a big heaping plate of eggs, carbs, and fat, travel south my friends. And let’s face it, I’m just at the tip of the southern U.S. who knows what I’ll find in Tennessee, Louisiana, or Texas! Before hitting breakfast, we stopped at the local farmer’s market. According to one of my friends, farmer’s markets have been steadily on the rise and even more so in the past year. It could be due to this whole idea of getting back to basics and eating a healthier diet, but it’s also about supporting locally grown food and the farmers who provide it and I think it’s great!

This particular farmer’s market had the usual fantastic selection of fruits and vegetables along with some local artisans selling their wares and folk musicians providing entertainment. They even had celebrity tomatoes! Do you know what those are? Me neither.

Can you spot Beyoncé in this picture? How about Eric Bana!

I ended up buying some homemade chocolate from Dolly Mama. What sold me is the Buddha box which contained chocolates made with honey and lavender, locally grown raspberries, and sweet tea. They were interesting and delicious but it’s very odd to eat lavender when you’re used to spraying that scent in order to make your bathroom smell good.

http://dollymamachocolate.com/

On the way to breakfast, Jen pointed out the TROSA Furniture and Frame Shop. TROSA is an innovative, multi-year residential program that enables substance abusers to be productive, recovering individuals by providing comprehensive treatment, work-based vocational training, education, and continuing care. They give substance abusers  a chance to learn a trade and help them get back on their feet, which I am all for. I could go on and on about the prison and rehab system in this country and all of the things that need to be fixed with them but this is neither the time or the place. Yes there may be a handful of people who cannot be rehabilitated no matter what you do and that is truly sad, but most people want to be contributing members of society and if we don’t help them do it, what does that say about us? Anyway, my hat’s off to you TROSA! http://www.trosainc.org/about/index.htm

Before getting brunch we stopped at Liberty Arts for a quick tour of this nonprofit educational sculpture studio and art casting facility. Our tour guide was a young teen named Emma and she was absolutely adorable. Her father started the place and she was so excited to talk about the history of Liberty Arts and the sculptures they make, not to mention the classes they offer to local residents. Here’s a couple pics but I recommend going to their website to see a picture of this place at night where the metal gets so hot, the entire place practically glows!

www.libertyartscasting.org

And now for the highlight of the morning. Breakfast at Rue Cler. If you’re ever in Durham, I highly recommend you eat breakfast here. http://www.ruecler-durham.com/

It’s a mix of southeastern ingredients served Parisian style. We started off with a half dozen beignets. Not as good as the ones I’ve had a Café du Monde in New Orleans but still a great treat. Then, I had the Frites Rue Cler. It’s basically just a pile of food, topped with more piles of food, and then another pile of food, with a pile of food on the side and that’s a southern breakfast for you! Per the description: A decadent plate of pommes frites topped with bacon, Gruyere cheese, and two fried eggs. Mmmmm. I’m sorry I don’t have a picture of it but I was so hungry, I was afraid I’d get saliva all over my camera. Dear arteries, I hope you can forgive me. It was pretty damn heavenly. Shockingly though, no hot sauce or Tabasco sauce! What the…? I guess it’s a little more Parisian than Southern after all!

After breakfast, we rolled ourselves out on to the street and got caught in a torrential downpour, which, in typical Southern fashion, ended in about 20 minutes and out came the sun.  Then it was off to the Mac store, so I could get my iPod accessories working in my car. It was a pretty suburban afternoon at the mall, which I’m sure you’ve all experienced so I won’t go into details. However, we did pass one store that had live models in the window. I’ve never seen such a thing and I can’t imagine doing that job. It must be agonizing to have to stand still like that for a long period of time and also deal with assholes who walk up to you in the window and try to distract you or piss you off.

We had dinner at (and I swear I’m not making this name up) The Almighty Wisdom of the Green Leaf God Indian restaurant. According to their window sign, “We always serve awesome food”. We opted for the buffet and it was pretty good but…awesome? I’m not 100% convinced. And I didn’t leave feeling any wiser or closer to the Green Leaf God. Then it was off to the movies. I know I can see a movie any time but it’s cheaper in Durham and there wasn’t much else to do. We went to see the current chick flick “Julie & Julia”. Now I wasn’t expecting much but I knew at the very least I would enjoy Meryl Streep’s performance. She is the most amazing actress and can do no wrong. I swear she could play a black person and I would totally buy it. I’m not condoning or advocating that Meryl Streep don blackface and play the lead role in the Harriet Tubman biopic. I’m just saying she could probably do it and it would be brilliant. Unfortunately, she was about the only thing I liked in the movie so I suggest you wait to rent this one. I just could not get on board with the co-protagonist, Julie, who cooked her way through Julia Child’s cookbook and got a book and movie deal out of it. I mean, kudos to her but compared to Julia Child’s achievements it pales in comparison. More Meryl please! Until tomorrow…

DAY 1: Off to a bitchy start…

Starting mileage: 18,207

I picked up my Nissan Altima at the Budget rental car in midtown. It’s one of those fancy key-less cars that you just push a button to start. Of course, it’s a misnomer because you still use a “key” that acts as a sensor for the button to even work so it’s not as futuristic and cool as I thought it would be. But it does have California license plates which is quite appropriate since that is where my journey will end. Packing up for a month is a bigger endeavor than I anticipated and so I parked the car on the street at a meter while I finished up my packing. As anyone who tries to park in New York City knows, it can be a logistical  nightmare. After two people stole parking spots from me, I finally was able to score a working parking meter on Broadway and 140^th Street. Just as I was about to back up to my spot, another car was trying to muscle its way in. The gauntlet was thrown and I got out of the car to let the driver know he was on marked territory. I was about ready to pee on the damn spot for dramatic effect. Thankfully he moved but not before pulling up beside me to let me know that I should have a better attitude when I’m driving. I couldn’t agree more, sir, but technically I’m parking and my attitude about parking is every woman for herself! My temper continued to flare while he maintained a cool attitude and we eventually we parted ways. This is not how I wanted to start my trip but at this point, I just want to let it go and move on. I was getting out of this damn town! How lucky am I to be going on this self-made adventure? And how thankful am I to be getting out of the city with its hot concrete and smelly garbage? Words cannot describe…

My first stop is Durham, NC to visit my friends Colie and Jen. Colie is a former roommate of mine that I found on CraigsList and we became fast friends after our first meeting. Do you ever stop and think of a particular person and literally thank God that they came into your life? Colie is one of those people for me. Her moving day into the apartment was literally 2 weeks after my mother passed away. When I was looking for a roommate, I actually got on my knees and prayed, “Please God, just send me someone who is nice and really cool and low maintenance. I can’t handle one more crisis or person who drives me crazy.” Well God did a great job answering this prayer and sent me Colie. She is a writer as well and super sweet and funny. I swear she made me laugh every day that we lived together and I never needed it more than I did during those post-mortem months. She lives in Durham with her girlfriend, Jen; also a super sweet and funny person and really freakin’ smart. She’s getting her PhD in ecology. I’m scared of her!  Hell, I’m impressed when someone can figure out how to program my iPod!

Since this first day is a driving day there’s not much to tell in the ways of sights and sounds but in summary:

Start time: 1:30 p.m. Much later than I had planned to leave. Weather fantastic until about 4:00 p.m. when the sky suddenly turned an ominous dark gray and a downpour began causing traffic to slow to a crawl of about 20 m.p.h. Thanks Hurricane Bill! This is easily an 8-hour drive that will eventually take 10.5 hours, unbeknownst to me.

4:30 p.m. – Rain stopped as suddenly as it arrived and shortly thereafter I saw an honest to God rainbow in the sky. It was big and beautiful and I haven’t seen one in years. I’m taking this as a good omen for the next 30 days as well as a gentle and humorous reminder that I’m on my way to visit the gays!  Hallelujah! I would have loved to stop and take a picture of it but I was already way behind schedule and there really wasn’t anywhere convenient to pull over so you’ll have to take my word for it; it was visually stunning and emotionally comforting.

Shout out to: Jack FM. Normally I don’t like commercial and/or corporate radio stations but they were having an all-80’s weekend which really made my music selection much easier. Especially since I didn’t have the plug I needed to hook my iPod up to the car stereo. I don’t know why I thought it would be a USB port. Um…maybe because I’m not technically savvy or intelligent? Again, really impressed with smart science-type folks! So I need to get to a Mac store at some point ASAP!

Worst thing: The traffic. I have driven in New York City, California, and at the Coliseum in Cleveland, Ohio after a Rolling Stones concert and I have never seen such abominable traffic. I’m not kidding. The traffic on I-95 around the Baltimore/D.C. area is so bad I think it’s one of the circles of hell. It would be at a standstill for 20 minutes, then it would pick up and you’d think you were done with it and then 5 minutes later it would start all over again. This happened for 2 hours. Again, thank you Jack FM. “Wake me up before you go-go” indeed. Ah George Michael…how could my 12-year-old self not have know you were gay? Same goes for you Joan Jett!

Saddest thing I saw: I stopped to get gas and a candy bar at around 10:00 p.m. that night. I had not planned to be on the road at this hour as I like to get all of my driving done during daylight hours but well, you saw what happened this morning with the parking spot and the late start time and the traffic and the rain, etc. I saw an older Indian man working at this Shell station having to deal with a lot of young obnoxious kids buying stuff and he looked so tired and sad. You could just tell that he was really sick of this job and he probably never planned on ending up here. I don’t mean to assume. Maybe he likes his job and was just having a particularly bad day but I tend to think not. There are a lot of unpleasant jobs in the world and someone has to do them and it really sucks. I hope that he has a wonderful wife to go home to that makes up for all of this…or husband, I don’t judge.

States driven through: New York, New Jersey, Maryland, Virginia, North Carolina. Wow, no wonder I’m tired!

11:30 p.m. – Destination finally reached! And it only took 10.5 hours. Despite all of the headaches of the day, I must always be thankful that I made it to my destination safe and sound, and I am. And Colie and Jen had a nice big fat glass of red wine waiting for me. I love these gals! Until tomorrow…

The reward for a long day's drive

P.S. And to that man who I yelled at about the parking space in New York, my sincere apologies. I didn’t mean it. Let’s try to work this out when I get back, OK?